Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Questioning Expectations & Walking with Push Toy

I am often told to have high expectations, but not unrealistic expectations.  That line is fuzzy for me when it comes to Ellie.  I am a "shoot for the stars" kind of girl. Determination. Ambition. Overachiever.  Those three words have been frequently used to describe me.   Just where is that line of pushing Ellie hard enough vs. unrealistic?  I do not know.  Will I ever?

Life is also a big checklist for me, which in turn translates to my child meeting those developmental milestones.  Standing unsupported. Check.  Drinks through a straw.  Check.  Uses a pincer grasp.  Blank box.  Life is not a checklist.  It isn't a competition.  I must stop comparing. This mental checklist of mine is getting thrown into the trash.  Right now.

Life is a journey with sharp turns, rocky bumps and sparkling rivers, wildflowers.  It is important to push through the bumps and turns, but to enjoy the rivers and wildflowers.

In theory, Ellie has taught me to take things slowly.  Well, slower.  I have discovered that with Ellie, gross motor skills are not slow.  She is a motivated, determined go-getter like her mother (and father).  She doesn't have time to sit still and learn how to use a spoon or point to flashcards because she is too busy trying to walk.  Yep. Walk!  My Super Ellie!  Okay, one last checkmark.  Walks with push-pull toy.  Check.  Burying the checklist right now.

We were walking down the driveway to get the mail. . . 

Then she just veered off and went into Max's yard.

Recently, I was beating my head against a wall because "why can't Ellie just look at these cards and point to the dog?"  After all, I see other, younger kids with Ds do it.  "Why will she not point to her ears?  We see ENT all the time she should know where her ears are or perhaps how to point".  This type of thinking does not do anyone any good.  Definitely not for Ellie.  She is a motor superstar right now!  The other things will come in time when ELLIE is ready, but right now my little girl has set her goal and is focused on it.  She doesn't have time for the other things.  And that is okay.

Well, let me just remove these pesky shoes.
Everyone knows the Bear-Bears go barefoot.

Check out my flexibility

Believe me, I know how the above paragraph sounds and I am ashamed of some of these feelings.  I love my Ellie.  I am SO very proud of my Ellie. She is a fighter who has taught me so much in her short little life.  Ellie has defied every one's expectations.  She is beautiful, smart, and a joy to everyone.  I truly am a proud mama bear who fully intends to encourage Ellie in anyway that I can.  Who will stand up for her.  Who will challenge her.  Who will be her #1 supporter and biggest cheerleader.  I will be with her every step of the way. . . wherever those steps may lead.

Adding a little round-a-bout to the journey.

Singing my mantra: Ellie will do things when Ellie is ready.  When she does, it will be that much more wonderful.



  1. She will catch on to it when she is ready. I know it is a hard concept for some of us - myself included. Sophia struggles with gross motor skills (push toy walking is just starting at 2 years old) ... but is starting to excel in cognitive/speech (because she is a "watcher" rather than a "mover"). I have the same checklist going in my mind ... but I usually keep it to myself because everyone always wants to remind me that "she will do it when she is ready".
    I personally think it is good to be goal oriented ... just sometimes it take longer for some goals than others that's all.

  2. That is awesome the way she is pushing around the walker!! I think sometimes I do Mark a disservice because I am so busy with everyone else that I sometimes push aside a lot of exercises that I should work with him on. But I know that he must be progressing each week with his motorskills since his therapists are always commenting on how much stronger he is getting!

  3. You're such a great mom.

    ...and photographer for that matter. Doesn't hurt that you have such a gorgeous muse.

  4. Claire really does well with gross motor too. The sitting still, listening and learning new words, not so much right now. I know it will all come in her own time though.


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