|Me, hyper? Never. I am the picture of tranquility.|
Ellie's most recent antic or disaster, if you'd like to call it, has me laughing now, but at the time, I was a bit mortified. I am warning you, if you get squeamish, now is the time to stop reading. If not, carry on!
It appears that Ellie is trying her best to limit my attempts at working out. I thought I had finally gotten her accustomed to the gym day care only to discover that incessant crying, screaming, and flailing isn't the only way to get recalled to the Kid's Club at 24 Hour Fitness.
For the past few workout sessions, I have heard "Will Anna Theurer please report to the Kids Club" in a loud, booming voice on the overhead speaker. I always feel like I am in trouble. As though I must report to the Principal's office. While Ellie is no longer throwing epic tantrums that can rival that of any two year-old, she has however rescheduled her bowel routines to coincide with my workouts. (I know she is doing it on purpose) That's right, just as I get into my grove on a heavy piece of
Glad to know you are regular.
|But Mama, everybody poops.|
However on Thursday, my mortification climaxed (yes, I said "climax") once I reached the Kids Club to change Ellie's diaper. It appears that Ellie took advantage of a lapse in staff supervision and helped herself to the contents of her diaper. Oh yes, there was poop everywhere. It was as though she painted herself in doo-doo. It was a nasty, foul-smelling stink bomb all over her hands, shirt, and face. Yes, her face. Apparently, Ellie decided to sample her little cow patty.
The looks on the staffs' faces were priceless (hey, maybe you should have been watching her a little better. Seriously, it looked like Ellie spent a good 15 minutes perfecting her poop-art). I am left wondering "will they ever let me back into 24 Hour Fitness?".
On the plus side, at least there were raisins in her stool so it wasn't completely unhealthy. (Gross, I know!)
|I am so ashamed!|
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(Okay, so here is the rest of the story. I arrive to the Kids' Club and the care providers are not doing anything-as in they are not stopping Ellie from her continued attempts at poo art [might I add that there were only 4 kids total to two care providers]. I start to wipe The Yucky Bear down with an entire package of wipes and I find out that I cannot get into their bathroom because it is locked. Meanwhile, both caregivers are just staring at us. I firmly ask them to unlock the